To be real, after enough pondering, so far I realized:

  • Ⅰ, experience brings another, exponentially.
  • Ⅱ, I lack too much of something, including experience, to be a normie, which they probably acquired naturally and I could not.
  • Ⅲ, ranting on about unfair inputs does absolutely nothing and none gives me a shit; no one ever teaches me.
  • Ⅳ, to be better by myself, or get fucked up, more; nobody and nothing, including time, bear with me.
  • Ⅴ, regardless of age, naïveté and unworldliness is an unforgivable sin in this world; I must learn myself, and accept and optimize as I learn.
  • Ⅵ, though I’m not sure about this one yet, it is unlikely for me to outdo their vast experiences; which is depressing, but there’s not much I can do about it, maybe. But even so, I need to shake off the fear of being immature and that of missing out. I do know fear does not help, don’t I?

⸻ Written on September 9, 2019.

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